But sadly that’s not the case for some out there, I’ve said it before but I will say it again and yell it from the top of my lungs if I have to .. JUST BECAUSE YOU CAN GOOGLE IT DOES NOT MEAN YOU CAN USE IT!

I am starting to see these so called designers who don’t ever buy copyright material to use in their work they simple just take whatever they find in a search engine!
This is illegal plain and simple!

And pardon my next comment … but it’s not just their ass on the line for using it if you BUY it from them and then use it your ass is on the line too!
Yes YOU, you can be fined for using material that you have not purchased rights to use.
You can play dumb all you want, if an artists is serious they will haul your ass into court!
And if it’s a big company like music or movies or cartoons or tv your going to be in even more trouble.

Many people think they have every right to use images of actors or musician because they are in the spotlight.
INCORRECT! you can be sued not only by the photographer who took the photo but by the celebrity your using.

You can play stupid all you want the fact is if they want to sue you they are going to and there is no dumb card you can throw in a court of law, theft is theft plain and simple.

It frustrates me as someone who spends THOUSANDS of dollars to make sure the images I use are legal and spend just as much buying materials so that my mom AN ARTIST can make them!

Next time you go to buy graphics online make sure you know what it is your buying.
If you have any doubt about copyrights ask to see proof that they have permission.
If they can not provide that or can not provide the name of the artist who originally did the work then walk away.
It’s not worth getting your ass caught in a sling.
Don’t be afraid to call someone out on their theft either!
Think of the original artist and how much time, money and effort went into creating each piece.
Even photography is not free, Most photographers spend thousands on that perfect camera, and even more on lighting, props, backgrounds etc.

Think of it this way, Would you walk into a bank and rob them of their money?
No so why rob an artist of the money they earn as a living?

People say “but Tami you can’t judge people, you don’t know what they are going through” and to that I say “Oh YES I do!” because about a decade ago I cared way more about what people thought then what I thought and did whatever I had to in order to fit in. Including pretending to be something I was not.
So Yes, Yes I can judge because I was in that position before and I learned a long time ago that it was what I thought that mattered not what others thought about me.
And almost every single person I am thinking of as I write this post is an adult and should know better!

I don’t understand why people do it either because eventually someone will out you and call you on your BS.
I’ve been told people who insecure are the ones who do it, I can see that but at the same time how is anyone really suppose to like you if your living a lie?
If someone does not like you for you then they are not worth knowing.

Don’t act like someone your not.
Don’t say things you don’t mean.
Don’t blame others for your misfortunes.
Don’t spend money if you don’t have it.
Don’t act like you have money when you don’t.
Don’t say your going to do something then don’t.
Don’t make others feel guilty for your stupidity.
Don’t join a click just to “fit” in.
Don’t berate people when you know you don’t like it done to you.
Act your age, not your shoes size.
Don’t treat people like shit to make yourself feel better.
Don’t be a hypocrite.
If you need help, ASK and GET it.
Bashing other people does NOT make you look cool.
Don’t try and impress others with lies.
Don’t dump your crap on people expecting them to fix you.

Be who you were born to be and be proud of that person if your not NOTHING in life will ever satisfy you EVER.
You’ll always feel the need to impress other people and not yourself and let me tell you those people you will try to impress will find a new and better you faster then you can say impress.
They are not friends if all they care about is material things and how well you can slam someone.

You have to ask yourself “AM I REALLY HAPPY?” .. “DO I MAKE MYSELF HAPPY?” if you respond with no then it’s time for you to do something else in life.
I’m not saying I still don’t struggle with those 2 questions because I do….BUT the difference between me and most other people is that I CHOOSE to get the help I need to achieve the goals I need to.
I find mostly that when I say NO to the above questions it’s because someone else has hurt me, But I have the choice to either allow it to effect me or move forward…easier said then done but I do it because I know it’s whats best for me both emotionally and physically.
People may shove me down but I have to make the choice to either get back up or stay down and I choose to not bullshit myself or anyone else.

I am who I am, You either take it or leave it!
If you don’t like me I don’t give a damn, That’s your issue not mine.
Don’t like my cloths? My hair? My body? My Make up? My music?, My family and friends? well to bad that’s your loss not mine.
My life will be better off without someone like you, I refuse to pretend any longer.
I will be who I am and be PROUD of myself!

Wanna know why? Cause I am awesome!

To my dismay this evening I was over at Perez Hilton’s site and found this tragic story of a 14 year old boy who committed suicide because he was being bullied so badly because of his sexuality.
http://perezhilton.com/2011-09-20-14-year-old-it-gets-better-filmmaker-commits-suicide-after-incessant-anti-gay-bullying

It brought me to tears, not only for this boy and his family but because yet again I realize just how cruel the human race can be.
I know what it feels like to be bullied and I’d even found myself not wanting to live thinking life would be better if I’d just die.
I can’t imagine what this poor boy went through to make him so sad that he thought death was his only option.

Shame on society for FAILING not only Jamey but thousands of children all over the world who are bullied on a daily basis.
Shame on parents who teach their children to hate, Shame on parents who are bullies and make their children into bullies.
Shame on the teachers and principles at schools for not taking more action to prevent these children from being tormented day after day.
Shame on the legal system for not stepping up and making harsher punishments for those who continue to be cruel.
Shame on social workers and guidance counselors for not listening more closely to these children and getting to the root of the issues.
Shame on doctors for not caring enough to HELP these kids.
Shame on the other children, parents and neighbors to sit around and WATCH as another child is humiliated and tormented by another person and do nothing.

To many use the excuse “It’s not my problem” but it IS your problem it’s EVERYONE’S problem!
Children should NOT be taking their own lives! plain and simple.
And we as adults should be doing everything in our power to make sure our children are safe and happy and healthy.

We need to teach our children tolerance and love, not hate and ignorance.
Every person has the RIGHT to live their life how THEY choose and they should not be tormented for it.

To the LGBT community I say not all straight people are assholes, There are those of us who love and accept who you are and will not judge you only embrace to as a friend.
We’re out here all you have to do is come find us.

If your a child who is being bullied please please please don’t take that permanent road you have way to much to offer this world.
There is a reason for you to be here, You may not know what it is just yet but trust me you were put here for a reason and with a purpose.
Find it in you to get help, MAKE someone listen. Don’t stop til eyes are open.
Hold your head high because whatever it is that makes you “different” makes you “Special” and “Unique”
Know that not all people are filled with hate and if you work it out you’ll find MORE people love you then you probably realize.

I will teach my son love and tolerance and it’s something I wish for everyone.
One day there will be an end to bullying and I hope the day comes sooner rather then later because as we can see through so many deaths lives depend on it!
But this can only happen if we stand together in a united front and say “NO MORE!”
This is a prayer I will continue to say and one day the lord will answer.

Something that’s really been pissing me off lately is all these people who’ve jumped on the “Anti Bullying” bandwagon but yet they are still BULLIES!
Their definition of bully must be far different from mine because as I see it hate is hate no matter how you choose to spread it and a bully is a bully no matter who your bullying and for whatever dumb reason it is that you’ve chosen to bully.

You can’t pick a choose between the two, Your either a bully or your not…You either hate or you don’t.
There is no fine line between the two.

You can’t say “I’m not a bully, I have gay friends, Muslim friends, black friends.” Then in that same breath say “Oh I so hate that fat chick over there she is disgusting!”
Body Mass Bullying is still BULLYING!
You can’t make fun of a fat person, or a real skinny person and then say your not being a bully because there is NO DIFFERENCE between hating someone because of religion or skin color or sexual orientation or their body mass!

Kids these days don’t seem to see the difference, They think “Oh I can’t say nothing bout him cause he’s gay, BUT we can go make fun of him cause he’s fat!”

We set out these no tolerance policies in our schools, yet no one actually follows through with them.
What’s the point of having them set in place if we allow one group of people to be bullied and discriminated against but not another group of people?
Where do we draw the line? When do we say enough is enough?
How do we teach our children that NO form of bullying is acceptable?

My best friend and I came from totally different ends of the spectrum and I didn’t until a few years ago understand that the words being flung at her hurt her just as much as the words begin flung at me.

I was the fat one, People always thought they were a laugh a minute making fun of how big my ass was or how my boobs were to big and sagged or how I had a mushroom top when I wore some cloths.
They thought it funny to call me lazy, saying I sat around watched tv and ate all day long.
People literally knew nothing about what was going on in my life, The fact was that I was starving myself and it backfired in my face instead of loosing weight I gained as my body would store and reproduce what fats I did take it to prepare itself for starvation mode again.
Yes fat people too can suffer from eating disorders!

My best friend on the other hand feared being fat to the point where she was never eating and became so thin people poked at her for that.
“If she turns sideways she will disappear” .. “Where did she go? Oh sorry didn’t see you there your so skinny”
She was pointed out all the time, Even as a thin women she could not escape being picked on.
She was to most people “To Thin” and that made her a target for bullies and hateful/ignorant people.

I’ve written about bullies before, We all know they don’t come at you alone they come in packs. So when these kids are being bullied they are not being singled out by 1 person they are being targeted by a group.

Words hurt! Bruises fade away and disappear but I will tell you this the words you inflict on another person can stay with them for a lifetime.

Be a part of the solution not the problem, If you’ve made the choice to stand up against bullies then do it!
If you are on the “anti bullying” campaign then don’t turn around and be a secret bully.
Choose your words carefully, and always think of how they will impact another person.
Your mother and father should have already taught you “If you don’t got something nice to say, Don’t say anything at all!” Live that motto.

No one person is better then any other person, No one person can ever know how another feels.
No one can ever really know how you might effect another person until sadly it could be to late.

Hate only breeds more Hate, Ignorance only breeds more Ignorance, Bullies only create more Bullies.

You each have it in you to change the way people think, You just have to stand up and use your voice!

With that being said I’d like you to take a look at an article a friend of mine posted online today…It’s from our cities paper the London Free Press.
http://www.lfpress.com/comment/columnists/2011/02/08/17191066.html

The title is “Would old, white men get away with this?” personally I think it should have been Would white people in general get away with this?
Because I am pretty sure if a group of white people stepped forward and said I want my children to only go to school with white/christian kids there would be such an uproar the earth would shake and it would be felt world wide…And rightfully so!
No one should dare ever say such absurdity, We live in a country that PRIDES itself on the fact that we are all for equality and kindness to everyone.
We pride ourselves on the fact that our country is so multi-cultural.
But yet here we stand in our own country being told that the way we live, the way we’ve lived for centuries is incorrect!

We’ve come a long long way in the equality movement and stuff like this puts us back in the dark ages!

I remember years ago when they pulled the lords prayer out of public schools, I didn’t care to be quite honest as I believed religion should never be forced on anyone.
Then a few years after that I was told I was not to wish people a “Merry Christmas” as it was politically incorrect.
This floored me! I know that the term Merry Christmas is related to Christianity but I’d never thought you HAD to be a christian to say it.
I mean it’s a polite and friendly saying/greeting at a giving and family time of year.
It’s a time for some to celebrate the birth of Jesus but for most like myself its a time to be with my family and friends and celebrate the love we share with one another…Christ takes a back seat for me during this time of year and I make it all about my loved ones.
So to be told that I shouldn’t say something that I’ve been saying for over 20 years was unbelievable to me and I refused. If someone didn’t like it TO BAD!

We’ve started living in a world where we have to walk on eggshells.
We have to watch every single thing we do and say because we might offend someone else.
My thought is, If I am not outright TRYING to offend you don’t assume I was meaning to.
Some things we just say and do because that’s how we were raised.
Just the same as you being raised a certain way.

I am offended quite a bit by other people but I choose to see past that and know that this is the way THEY live, This is how THEY were taught, those are THEIR beliefs and who the f**k am I to tell someone how THEY should live or how THEY should think/feel or how THEY should speak or teach their children or act in public or address other people.
I don’t tell people how THEY should dress, What THEY should wear or who THEY should speak to.
I have no blood right to tell someone that they way they live is WRONG….And if I did actually say it, It would be held against me with such anger I may actually fear for my own safety.

So if I have no right to tell you how to live what gives you the right to tell me how to live?
What gives you the right to come to MY country and tell me and my fellow countrymen that the way we live is wrong and incorrect and that WE should change to accommodate you?
We did change to accommodate you, We let you into our country to be FREE men and women!
We gave you a home, gave you health care, helped you get jobs, sent you to school, Allowed our tax payers to pay for your government assistance and took you away from war and poverty.
And what do we get in return?
We get told that we live incorrectly, that WE should change for YOU. That we are WRONG in our own beliefs, thoughts, feelings and actions.

Enough is enough, If you want your children to be taught a specific way use money you raise to open your own set of schools, Do not impose your ideals onto our public school system.
You want stores to only sell your type of food and clothing, Open your own stores and stop shopping at ours.
You want your children to learn or act in a specific type of way stop allowing them to participate in OUR activities such as Christmas, Valentines, Halloween etc.

The saddest thing about it all is that we WELCOME you to this country, we go out of our way to show you that Canada is a wonderful place to live and be a part of and you turn around and slap us in the face.

I love that Canada is multi-cultural. I love the fact that my son will grow up to know people all of races of all religions of all sexual orientations. I am proud that he will be able to see beauty in all shapes, sizes and colors.

When stuff like this happens we do not live in a peaceful nation, We do not teach our children tolerance and to be good to everyone.
We’re teaching them that we’re divided and that if 0ne person does not share the same belief as you that must mean automatically that they are bad.
And I don’t know about you but that’s not a world I want to raise my child in.

So if Canada is such a horrific place that will not accommodate you then maybe it’s time you thought about heading back to your own country.
Because if I was to move to your country I would be asked to be like you, And if I dare asked your country to change its ways for me I would probably be thrown out.
So if you don’t like the way us Canadians live…its simple….leave!

Time and time again I come across business websites using stolen artwork or graphics and I can not tell you how much this makes my teeth grind!
Ignorance is NOT BLISS PEOPLE! If you didn’t create it or buy it then it most likely means you CAN’T use it!

As a graphic artist myself I know how much time and money goes into creating a piece of work and to see others having their work ripped off really pisses me off.

Just cause you did a google search and it came up does not give you the right to take it and use it on your website or blog or wherever else you choose to stick it.
Someone out there is not being paid while you’re using their images to promote something you want to sell and really do YOU think that’s fair?
Would you like someone to come steal your work, plaster it all over the internet and make money using something YOU created?

Do you even realize how much time and money goes into these types of things?
How much labor of love goes into creating that perfect image or taking that perfect photo?

Others work hard so you can sit on your ass and steal, what a shame…You should be ashamed!
And you may not think your a thief but you are plain and simple and any artists out there who actually work their asses off to create something will tell you that very same thing.

Ignorance is not bliss, Your a thief and you should be held accountable for those actions.

What Women Want: (And Men Too!)

Someone who makes us feel good. Makes us feel sexy and desired.

Someone who is willing to listen even if they don’t care about what we are talking about.

Someone who supports our goals and dreams and doesn’t cut us down for having them.

Someone who’s head and feet are firmly planted in reality, But who isn’t afraid to dream.

Someone who can pick up on when we’re having a bad day and try to help us through it.

Someone who respects not only us but our personal space.

Someone who is not afraid to show emotion.

Someone who is secure both emotional, physically and financially.

Someone who cares for others, not just themselves.

Someone who is strong so that when we fall apart we can fall apart into your arms.

Someone who’s affectionate with out being told to.

Someone who puts their partners needs ahead of their own.

Someone who is helpful and courteous.

Someone who’s honest and who doesn’t keep secrets with no games or bullshit.

Someone who see’s their problems and tries to solve them.

Someone who is willing to drop the issues and baggage.

Someone who chooses to live with a positive attitude rather then a negative one.

Someone who picks us up rather then puts us down.

Someone who doesn’t always have to be “right”.

Sadly most will see this “list” as someone who’s asking for “too much”.
But we’re not looking for Mr. Perfect (At least I’m not), Just someone who is willing to go the distance to show me they care so I know it’s someone worth devoting my time too.

Most don’t realize if you just treat a person (specially women) right they’ll be yours forever!
But play head games and fuck with someone’s emotions and there will forever be doubt and you can bet almost for sure that the relationship will fail.

Keep in mind ladies these same things apply to what a man would want as well.

People’s “needs” tend to get lost in the shuffle of the relationship dance.
Or we tend to settle when you were not completely happy.
Either one is going to cause chaos in a relationship specially if both parties involved don’t bother to talk openly and honestly about what’s going on.

Like I said this is just my own point of view, and you may not share it.
I’ve been around the block and picked up a few things in my many years on earth and sometimes I just feel like sharing whether people like it or not.

It’s not in my happy times nature to spew vulgar from my mouth, It only tends to pop out when something is troubling me or bothering me.
And these days my lordie EVERYTHING is bothering me!

I know it’s in part due to the fact that my pregnancy is causing hormone surges to race through my body, And it’s not helping that I’ve now been off my “crazy” meds for 4+ months!
Yes I said crazy meds, because to be honest I feel so friggin crazy right now and I KNOW for a fact that they really did help calm my thoughts and allowed me to process through my emotions at a better rate.

With out my medication my thought patterns seem to be aggressive and impulsive. I don’t think things through and tend to lash out a lot quicker then I would normally.
Don’t get me wrong I am not a friggin monster who will tare your face off with the slightest ignition but if pushed the wrong way I will tend to withdraw and become angry.
The worst part is; Is I tend to take it out on those who are closest to me and have nothing to do with what’s going on.
I have a difficult time telling those who really piss me off that THEY are in fact the ones who’ve pissed me off.

So if you ask me now if I am angry, then I will say yes to a degree.
I am so tired of listening to other people’s drama and shit, People who have no regard for anyone but themselves.
I might be a bitch but I always think of how my actions will directly effect those around me, and I try to not allow my bullshit to pull others down. Now if only others had that same sense of reasoning I would not be going off like a handful of friggin firecrackers everyday!

I don’t think people really understand that I am going through so much at the moment that I can not physically or emotionally handle their crap!
I have my own crap to wade through and to be honest it’s a LOT and getting through it is a day to day process so when  I am working hard to stay healthy for myself and my child it’s hard when others dump their shit on me too.
I am a good friend, Loyal to the end…I will be there for my friends when they need me.
But to take advantage of that and dump you crap ALL the time makes me want to get the f**k outta dodge.
And trust me when I can not longer handle your crap you’ll know it, cause you’ll be GONE from my life for good!
There is only so much one person can take before they say “I give up”, Only so many times a person can watch another one smack their head off a wall before they say “they are a lost cause”.

I’ve cut people out of my life before, and it was to protect myself so I am not afraid to do it again.

So if sometime down the road your no longer on my facebook, I am no longer emailing you or taking your calls or replying to your text messages. Don’t take it personally I am just more important then you.
That sounds so vain, But it’s a motto we should all live by.
Be a friend…A friend who is supportive and caring.
A friend who will listen and love.
Do what we can as a friend to help our friends through.
But in the end remember YOU are the most important and if a friend compromises your own well being then it’s time to let those friends go.
A real friend is not a friend if all they do is use you when they need someone to dump on.

That goes for me too, I’ve found myself lately saying sorry to my friends for dumping my crap on them.
I know it at times feels lonely but remember friends can only burden themselves so much before they themselves have had enough.